Texas

It's weird...I wanted to live her because Whatever's whole family is here. The state isn't horrible either. The issue is...small towns suck. It could just be this one, but I have a feeling it's like this in any tiny place. People are so quick to try to "one up" each other. "I just got a new Coach purse!". "Yeah, I just got two new Coach purses!". Who gives a flying rats ass?! Being all super Christianly is a contest too. The longer I live here the less I care to be associated to religion. I rarely see actual Christian values being exercised at all times. Is anyone perfect? No, but this place is full of sheeple that are good at pretending they are at church for God or themselves...really it's a fashion show and gossip update center. I am looked at with judgey eyes if I go in the gas station. It wasn't always this way. You piss off the right local and that is your punishment. Gossiped to death. It's funny how Whatever asks me how I can generalize a whole town. I can positively say that no person here is an exception. I have heard and seen it from Teachers to Preachers. They are all under the same small town anti-new people rules. I was told by people who have lived here for several years but not since birth or their grandparents, grandparents birth, "You will never be accepted". Yes, they raised children here (and grandchildren now too!) but still feel like outsiders. It's refreshing to hear that I'm not insane. Other people realize the way these people act. I was treated nicely in 2006 when I lived here for a short time. Looking back, I bet it was just smiles in my face... Shame on me for not seeing through the fake. I am elated that Whatever doesn't want to live here. He didn't want to come back... I was the one that thought "family" was a good reason to live somewhere. I could not have been more wrong. Live and learn.

Son of a...

I am fucking livid. I have had it. If I am asked, in front of people, about my finances again...I so will loose it. I have been nice. I have held back. No more. I'm sick of being the bigger person. This whole place can kiss my big white ass. I am who I am. Whatever married me and he hasn't complained yet. It's interesting how all these "Christians" are professional gossips and have no better things to do. The children are less disciplined here than I've seen on military posts and that's saying something. People seriously are just hateful. I am sure there are a handful of real Christians out there somewhere but my generalization is very accurate. The people here prey on outsiders, their own family and whoever else they can attack when they feel fit to. It's daily life it. Selfish, good for nothing,
assholes. I love how southerners (more specifically Texans) believe their shit doesn't stink when really they and knee deep in the smelly shit!!

Holy crazy days!

It's been beyond busy! Whatever is visiting from sand land and Smarty has the flu. The frickin flu! It's horrible. He's never been so sick. We were called home from our Dallas vacation early to tend to the ill one. He was in crazy pain and chills and fever kicked his tiny little ass. I gave him prescription meds for the flu. That's when you know it's bad. I don't give drugs to my kids for many things. This one was needed. In fact, we dosed Gizmo as a precaution. This kind of sick isn't playing. Im so exhausted it's not funny. I have to take a test in a testing center at school by Monday...and 3 online by next Sunday. Ugh. This week is insane. I'll do it though. I am going to take the summer off school. I plan to start running in the mornings and just hanging out with the boys. Good times.

So tired

I barely slept last night at all and today I felt fine until late this afternoon. I was incredibly tired. I decided that resting was a good idea because the boys were away at the in-laws. Bad idea. I woke up n hour later disoriented and freezing. My stomach felt horrible too. Maybe it's the stress of seeing Whatever soon or I'm just plain getting sick...either way, it's unwelcome. I hate to feel crappy! I'm a mom! I have too much to do!

Cell phones in public

I'm at my pedicure place. MY pedicure place. Where I like calm, quiet, relaxing pedicures. This is usually the case. Today, a lady is on her phone jabbering about cancer and death and all other inappropriate things out loud in MY relaxing place. I know that her kids sleep next to her in her one bedroom apartment. Dear god. Shut up. This broad is nuts. Giggling and death are not a convo I'm up for. Go home and gossip. Argh!!


Update!! Her phone died! Bahahaha!!! I love it. Every other person here smiled!

Kids in cars

I hate to let my kids ride in cars with anyone besides me. I assume it's a control thing. Smarty is going with the FIL and BIL to the movies 15 minutes away and I'll be a stressed out mess until he gets back. It's raining really hard today so that just contributes to my crazy. I hope he enjoys the movie and doesn't mind that squeeze him tight when he returns.

Gizmo

He is a badass...if I could post videos here that would be awesome. He was in the van lip syncing to Taking Back Sunday. How many 2 year olds are that cool? He was totally into it and even added his own little jam at the end. I love that little turd.

Jeans

Why is it when I need a specific pair of jeans they are not to be found? I know when I last wore them. I know they were removed in my home. I bet they show up when I either lose 20 lbs or gain it, ensuring that they cannot be worn. I will find you this week jeans. Mark my words....

Back to the diet.

I have regained 5 lbs. Awesome. I need to shed another 10.... Then I'll be happy for a bit. I blame girl scout cookies. They are so good. They must have some ingredient that strips you of your willpower.

Pics!

I can post pics here! Sweet. Fb is completely unneeded now.

Bye fb

I stopped fb again. I have too much to do and well, people suck. I hate to sound like all I do is bitch but I'm fed the fuck up with everyone and everything. I just need to be alone for a few days to actually accomplish something. I can't even fully clean my house. It's depressing. Im behind in life. I don't know how single moms do it. I just want an hour to clean my house and study. I will be saying no to everything I'm asked to do from here on out. I just need to get back on track. Who knew a vacation would mess me up so bad? I blame my family more....extended visits are no longer welcome here.

The anti-religion.

The smaller the town the bigger the gossip. The damn "christians" that live here. If you are judging and living a life full of regret-less sin...I'd say you are wrong. Fucking bible thumping, heathen raising, southern douchebag christians. I hope I move from this horrid place fast enough for my children to not become infected with the poison that you people call life. Fucktards.